Things get grizzly as Andy Daly & Matt Gourley bring us the next podcast pilot hosted by Broadcaster and Game Show Host Chip Gardner. With his trusty longtime announcer Tip Thompson, Chip & Tip will recall past game show failures, play some of their favorite games from over the years, and share tips & recommend chips to listeners in a segment called Chip’s Tips & Tip’s Chips. Plus, Chip will debate formidable opponent Carol Channing for the honorary position of Mayor of Hollywood and we are taken through a day in the life of a feeble-minded man named Chocolate Pudding in Chocolate Pudding Does Whatever The Fuck He Wants.
If it’s wrong that I can’t wait to hear Chip Gardner say “Hail Satan” again, I don’t want to be righteous.
You should check this out
After they’ve changed into their swimwear, all new pool guests will be startled by staff members before they reach the water. No squirts? No problem.
We can even call the screening area “The Brown Zone.”
I’ve had a crush on her since Gilmore Girls. Love this gorgeous woman.
Me too. <3
And then my life was changed forever.
Number two is done. I really mean this one. From the bottom of my heart.
Costco CEO Craig Jelinek supports raising the minimum wage.
Costco announced record profits today, averaging $10,000 in profit per employee compared to $7,400 at Walmart.
The secret to Costco’s success is paying employees well, providing benefits, and giving them an opportunity to unionize.
So large corporations’ excuses that treating & paying workers well would damage profits are all a crock of shit.
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The training has begun contrary to popular belief probably I do worry about getting on stage however I can also honestly say that I’m not scared of it. I had this horrible thing happen when I first started doing stand up. My son only being about a year old at the time had this thing called a feberal seizure. As a first time parent who refused to scare himself by reading all these books that would have scared the shit out of me. I would have known that these can be fairly common and that is kind off like an emergency off switch to reset and cool the body.
But I didn’t read any of those terrifying epics about what to expect when you have no idea what the fuck you’re doing because you’re 27 and this kid is the only thing outside of a pet that you have had to take care of. Because in that moment when I was driving to get him checked out at a walk in clinic with people who know way more about the human body then my dumbass but while we are driving there he goes into this full blown seizure while my wife is in the back seat. I am doing the way wrong thing which is blowing though a stop sign honking like mad which catches the attention of this nurse who was behind me she realizes that something is wrong and calls 911 while my wife is doing the same thing. I pull over on the side of the road and start trying to give him cpr this was officially the most terrifying thing I had ever been through. The nurse pulls up behind me and asks if she can help and take over seeing the tears and terror in my eyes. 30 secs and he’s fine completely out of it and he can barely talk. But he was okay and he still is okay at 3 yrs old it was a bump in our week that week and nothing bad happened after that.
The reason I tell that story is to explain how even though I’m nervous to start doing standup agian for the first time in over a year I’m not scared the worst that could happen is someone or everyone doesn’t find me funny. Big deal then I need to write some better stuff or they just don’t connect with me either way what happened after that seizure was amazing I was inspired to live each day to it’s fullest and to cherish the time I have with the people that still talk to me I’ve been beating myself up about it trying to put the whole pilot and tv writing thing up front but I forgot this place that makes me feel good and gives me this outlet. I never went up and told that story or what happened that day on stage and I think that was a mistake.
One of my biggest mistake when I started doing standup was that I thought I had to prepare everything I said up there and make sure that it is all funny. Now I didn’t always fulfil that goal most comics don’t their first year. But since then I have been “writing what I know” and in that way I have found that the more honest I am about my feelings on a certain subject the more laughs it gets in the end unless it’s just silly I laugh at a lot of silly I think its because it always makes me young and happy.
Okay so all jokes aside the scariest thing in my life was when my kid wouldn’t breath during a seizure which I thought meant death. It wasn’t me dying on a stage for a hand full of people who didn’t know my name until the host who has just met me mispronounced it. As a writer I think the right thing for me right now is to write jokes that should come out of my mouth in a room full of people who find it appropriate to drink in the middle of the week. So that’s the focus. To get back to what I used to be and where I used to feel at home. Yay! Self affirmation writing can feel good even if you don’t post it which I do a lot cause I’m needy like that. But I think I’ll post this one.
Damn that was a long one I apologize.
Not really no ones holding a gun to your head. Or are they? Dun dun dun!
It is weird lately how much I have on my plate by my own hand of course the wife the other day was telling me that multitasking has been proven to kill brain cells. To that I could not stop thinking about how much damage I have been doing to myself over the last year I thought I had done the right thing by taking a few things off of my plate. Standup for one and videogames which to be honest was almost a welcome lose. But in hind sight I think I am not better off. I haven’t caught much flak but I have gotten a little bit of jibing my way about where I’ve been and what I’ve been doing and the fact of the matter is I’ve been writing a crap load and I felt like that was enough.
But I realize now that I miss it too much there is an immediacy to standup that I feel is missing from everything else I’ve been doing. But on a positive I haven’t been spending nights away from my kid and positive things have come from that. He now requires books to be read to him and he is retaining them at a rate that would come off as bragging. And I don’t do that much so hell yeah it rocks. I feel good about having made that decision in hind sight and I feel like I still have more to say. Its weird too because when I started this blog I didn’t know that I would use it half assed and in times of worry but I was thinking about putting up all of the writing from my past or just what ever I feel like shooting the shit about. Maybe this was pointless or maybe it was therapeutic? Either way it was for my own stupidity about my place in this so called world. Still looking.
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